Thursday, October 29, 2009

Alleged Burglars Attempt Crime In Black Face

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In Iowa, two white suspects were pulled over by local police after their car matched the description of a caller reporting a crime in progress. The suspects, Mat McNelly, 23, and Joey Miller, 20, were found in their car wearing Sharpie permanent marker on their face. The suspects were arrested and posted bail. Their lawyer has no comment so far. I suggest Sharpie compensate the bail posted by the suspects for the free advertising provided. Also, the Al Jolson Family Trust and Estate should see an increase in revenue for the increased interest in old time Black Face performers.

I have several suggestions for future would-be burglars that want to conceal their faces:
1) egg on their face
2) if the perpetrators are black, white-out their complexion (opposite of these idiots)
3) ski masks
4) dress up in drag with foundation, lipstick, and rouge
5) the eyeglasses with a fake nose and mustache
6) a Presidents face rubber mask (Bush or Obama recommended)
7) panty hose
8) shoe polish


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